Victorious, I am

Woolies sells soft-gum lollies. The best lollies that I've ever known, or sweets as some would prefer. But I was to be gravely saddened when I could not find them on the racks. I recorded that from the period 30 January 2009 to April 2009, the Greenside store has not stocked the soft-eating gums. The store currently stocks the Woolworths Wine Gums in the impulse section leading to the tills; and although they may look the same, these are not the same as the Soft Gums.

Upon discovering this, I conveyed my deepest disappointment to the woolies corporation. It had been 3 months without any soft gums in my mouth. Each visit I made to the store had been inspired, and indeed spurred on, by these wonderful soft-eating gums. I began to doubt my association with the soft gums and more so the store. I wrote letters, i sent emails urging them to correct this. I requested in earnest for an order in large quantities, in the range of 1000 packs to be placed promptly. If this did not happen, my life would never be the same, again.

I am now happy to report the woolies customer care dude emailed back to apologise. He requested my number so that when the stock arrived, he would call me. A day later, the store manager also rang to apologise and gave me the best news - the soft gums had arrived! I feel ever so victorious. At this news, I organised to purchase 10 packs to last me at least a month.

After such effort, I decided it would be fair to establish the soft-gum appreciation society, in the hope that others will also join this great movement. But even beyond joining, I hope you will take this; that if you believe in something strongly enough, and you desire to see change...you can change the world around you! I am the founder of the soft-gum appreciation society, or SGAS for short, the 1st chapter in the universe and this is my story.

match point, max!

my buddy steve invited me to play soccer for his team on saturday. They were 1 player short, so i filled in for him! I think i'm his token black friend! Perhaps i should charge for my appearances! Our team won (not so much because of my efforts), they had another black player... and I basically sucked major!

Anyways, I can't remember the last time i played active sport, but after this weekend i wondered why i wasn't doing any sport anymore -When i woke up on sunday morning, i remembered why stopped playing, it hurts, especially the morning after! Its now monday, and it still hurts!

smell like streep, for cheap

Is merryl streep still alive? If so, she'll be glad to know that she's got me thinking about perfume. I have a weird to desire to develop a smell distinctly max. I should research a male equivalent of merryl streep's versatility, starting tomorrow. So far, my natural odour has not got me a single compliment in all the queues I've stood in. This great injustice has got to be addressed. From this thoughtful introspection, I have decided to add the mission to stimulate queue conversations to my life-list-of-things-to-do. How? The best way to stimulate a queue conversation is to smell nice, for cheap!

my issue with dog napping

Today i want to pick on dog napping. We have a sausage dog, called Hitman, and we generally like his company. I have noticed he finds many things enjoyable, such as running around the house, jumping up when someone arrives and salivating at the scent of food.

Hitman also likes to nap, and I find this interesting and annoying. For all the lazing around he does, why does he nap so much? I think dogs have been domesticated so much, they have developed very strange hobbies and mannerism. Dog napping is annoying because i'm always tired when i see Hitman lying on the couch. Its not fair because i work so much harder than he does! Its like Obama and his dog Bo. I bet Bo gets to sleep a lot longer than Obama. For as long as such inequalities exists, we will never see real change in this world!

the more things change...

Today, my work goblins moved me to a new office with a recently new flat screen computer. I can't stop starring around at everything, it all seems so unfamiliar. The computer is fun and has handled my basic commands very well, so im rewarding it with mid-day post.

Let me describe my new office space:

I have no spectacular view of rolling hills or green grass banks, only blank walls and 2 black doors.

My desk has 2 drawers and is made of wood, cheap wood! It measures 1.6m x 0.8m, that's small. I have 1 phone, 1 computer, 1 blue chair, 1 red tray and 1 black dustbin.

I share my office with Tim. He has a German surname that I can't remember or spell. His desk is identical to mine, except his flat screen is bigger than mine. Tim and I share the office with hundreds of books, magazines, files and geological maps - its our little public library. I've been thinking I should chat to him about charging a small fee for anyone who wishes to use our material.

The company office has a total of 4 fans, and between Tim and myself we have 3 of those. Its an impressive number of fans, except now with winter upon us we have no use for them.

Hmm, that's about it.

After this careful assessment, I have come to the conclusion that my new office is boring and has little prospect of developing its fun-ness-ness-side. So, I will now leave you to write me suggestions on how I could improve my new employment arrangement. Ok...

Go:

the monday i can't remember

It's wednesday today, and I can't remember what happened on monday. I hope its normal to have no memory of a day as recent as 48hrs ago, otherwise I may be hosting a brain-come-mush!

the financial crisis and the fight against poverty

I spent most of today thinking about how the effects of this financial crisis have all but wiped out years of progress against poverty. The thought of it made me angry because its all man made and totally reversible, only if our leaders had the will (10 years ago) to tackle the real issues! After more thought, I asked myself, say we solve this financial crisis...will our planet be physically able to support the growing appetites of an increasingly wealthy global population? Are we going to have enough oil, enough food, enough clean...or will solving it mean more poverty? Apparently the Malthusians had theories about this... Now i'm overwhelmed because once we solve the poverty problem, will have a huge environmental challenge on our hands!

discoveries i made today

These things i discovered today, and i like...
1. Five-Roses Orange Tea
2. Stolen ice cream moments
3. Napping on the office roof

the big fuss about women and compliments

When it comes to compliments, women are ravenous blood-sucking monsters always wanting more, more and more! And if you give to them, you’ll be expected to be the dog that just keeps giving. How many men have suffered from telling lies about how pretty a woman 'supposedly' looked. How many more wonderful words are we supposed to collect just to hold up your self-esteem, woman! The dishonesty has to stop! I’m seeking to balance my views on this subject; however, at the moment I feel women should work on their confidence and self-esteem, because I’m not going to do it for them. ...unless there's a macflurry involved, and maybe fishing, followed by playstation-saturdays, and no talking on sundays, and ...